Monday, November 10, 2014

Wargaming Rip Off. Gold cost analysis of 11-11-11 Veterans Day Special.

I hate being ripped off. I especially hate the way has added so many payment options that we lose track of what's really a deal. I find it especially despicable that they would rip us off over a 'veterans day special'. It's at best, sloppy in-house cost analysis, and at worst a deliberate money grab. I'm talking about the 11-11-11 special in which you get 11 garage slots, 11 premium consumables, and 11 days of premium. Do not buy this. Here's why:

I did an analysis of the cost of gold in all the ways you can get it. I broke this down into how much premium time would cost you, with all the ways you can buy it. Wargaming has added so many options and I think it's in a deliberate attempt to confuse the consumer. I'll try to keep this simple.

Gold is available in various packages with the less gold you buy, the more it costs you. All figures are in Canadian Dollars.

Premium time is sold in-game for gold, and in the shop for real cash (pay pal, credit card, etc). There are various costs then for differing amounts of premium time. This will also vary depending on how you pay for it. There are five costs shown in the rows which correspond to the five costs of gold shown above.

The best deal is the cash purchase from the premium shop for 1-year which works out to $8.99 per month. If you buy the biggest gold package, then the 1-year deal in-game you will pay $9.06 per month. The most you will pay is 14.18 dollars by using gold in-game after buying the smallest gold package.

So, what about that 11-11-11 "special"?

11 garage slots at full price are 300 gold each. Premium consumables at full price are 50 gold. 11 days of premium at the BEST cost per day possible is $0.30 (using the 1-year premium cash purchase as discussed above). The total cost will of course depend on how you buy your gold but the absolute best you can do is .0045 dollars per gold. That makes the "special" cost $20.62 if bought for gold in-game. The premium store cost of the 'special' is $26.17 which means they are charging you an extra $5.55 because they think you are stupid. Never mind the fact that garage slots and consumables are frequently on sale, or that you can buy premium consumables for in-game silver. Even if, like me, you can't afford $113.26 gold at one time, it still doesn't add up to a deal unless you are buying the $7.88 gold package for all your gold purchases.

I've posted on this before and they keep doing it. I have no faith that they will ever stop because they are not called on it very often, and it's pretty much 'buyer beware' for online purchases isn't it? Please use the charts above to more easily figure out what things are actually costing so you can get the best deal possible. They are hoping you don't.


Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Next I'll Try Porn

Like a fat old boxer I never learn, or maybe, to be more accurate, I always go back when I shouldn't. It's been several months since I last played World of Tanks. More than a few patches have come and gone and I've yet to try them. Fancy new graphics, new game modes, new tank trees.... wait, no that doesn't count because I've always felt that new tank trees were a shit form of 'new' content. Lazy buggers.

So like a fat old boxer I decided to get in the ring again. Surely, by now, the game would be better, or rather (at least) I'd have fun again after a nice refreshing break. I patched up my game engine, downloaded and installed my mods, and bam! I was off. Now, by now, if you know me at all, you can guess how this is gonna turn out. I found myself, merely three games in, alone, on a flank, in a tank not designed to hold said flank. My teammates? Oh never fear, dear reader, they were pushing hard on the opposite flank! They were gonna take that flank, by gosh, and it didn't matter if one or two of them died. Or three. Or four. Or, maybe ten of them. Yes, I said ten.

Well now we're not gonna let that shake us are we? As an eternal pessimist I have to say that yes, it did. Never-the-less I played a few more, and though we won, I was growing frustrated with my poor performance. I was rusty, and I hate that. Oh, and you know what else I hate? Holding a flank. Alone. Again, and again, and again. And just when I thought that holding a flank all alone was getting pretty darn boring I started to get abuse from a team mate because I wasn't charging the enemy. Alone. On a flank. Uphill. Ironically enough, the very same map, on the very same flank, up the very same hill, that 10 of my team-mates had previously died at. Yes, ironic and funny in the same way getting shot in the knee is funny. (Ha. ha.... Oh shit that hurt). So what did I do?

Weeeelllll, I lose it! I over-react. I say hey, mush mouth.....

Never mind, that'll make more sense if you listen to the video below, or you're a good Canadian who knows about 'The Champ' comedy radio clips.

Needless to say I wasn't impressed. I wasn't having fun, and I wasn't playing well. Just like Mike Tyson (who I think, by the way, has done a remarkable job of re-inventing himself so don't track me down and beat me) I shoulda stayed away and sipped some nice scotch while reminiscing about the glory days when my WN rate was over 1300 and my win rate was 52%, and all the tank roads were paved with gold (ammo, that is).

So what's next for Gank? I really don't know. I did dabble with War Thunder but only for a battle or two. I don't have the mental stamina to learn a new multi-player game. Maybe I'm just in a gaming funk. Maybe, like Mike, I"ll try my hand at becoming a porn star. Surely they desperately need handsome, out of shape, middle aged men to make it more realistic? Imagine the money they'd save- I'd only be on set for five minutes, and then I'd need a week to recover. How can they lose?

No? Alright, how about a one man play then? Surely Spike Lee wouldn't mind doing my life story too. I could trade him a top notch world of tanks account with 25k in gold, and a pile of premium tanks. Spike? You there Spike? It's a good deal my friend. Heck, I'll even start watching your films again (no I won't)!

Ahhh, fuck it, let's just listen to the champ.

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

It's Not Paddys Day Anymore.........You Feckers

No, it's definitely not Paddys Day anymore and I know this because I can see the previous post I made which clearly states that's it is Paddys Day. Using deductive reasoning I can conclude that, save for one of my patented time travels, it's not Paddys Day. That and I can see the date on the calendar so, you know, that helps.

So, yea, two posts all year? Wow, that's pretty shit, and what ever happened to that whole You Tube thing? Well, if you must know I've retired for the moment and am sitting back enjoying the cash that floods in every month from my monetized views. It simply takes me ages to decide how to invest the five bucks I get every month. Ages. With time being limited I decided to give IOS gaming a serious go. This way, you see, I can get 'quality' time in with She Who Will Be Named Later on the couch. She is currently getting caught up on Orange is the New Black and is a season behind. After months of proclaiming she wouldn't watch it, she is now feeling awfully foolish for being so stubborn. I don't blame her, really, as most pop-culture 'hit's are anything but, however, in this case I personally vouched for it and I have some pretty discerning taste with regards to TV.

And God Bless Netflix. Let me just get that out of the way. They've saved me from a life of piracy and you tube only viewing. I love Netflix. Can you marry a streaming service I wonder? Maybe, but then as I was married in Ireland I'd have to be legally separated from She Who Will Be Named Later for FOUR YEARS before I could divorce her, and would Netflix wait for me? Likely not. I guess I'll just stick with what I have....for now. Bloody Irish and their Catholic Pro-Family ways.

Right, where was I? Ah yes, IOS gaming on the Ipad specifically. I crossed over the the dark (apple) side over a year ago now and decided to give the gaming aspect a proper go. Now, 'proper' is open to interpretation of course, but this is me lads, so you won't find shit games like Angry Elephants or what-ever is sucking the cash out of the punters these days. My first foray was a classic oldie that I loved very much- Sid Meier's Pirates! I also grabbed Frontline: Road to Moscow (Slitherine strategy), and Battleheart Legacy (Action RPG). I have my eye on the recently released (for IPAD) Democracy 3, and the $20 Battle Acadamy (plus more for the DLC or, as they call it in the app store, IAP). I note the $20 price tag because it seems expensive to most IOS gamers due to the flood of .99 games and 'free' games which will cost you an arm and most of a leg to actually play- but they're FREE so that's BETTER than $20 isn't it?

So far, I have to say, I'm slightly impressed, but not overly taken with IOS as a format for games. Pirates plays like shit with touch controls (only my opinion, many people rate this game highly and it is very, very faithful to the PLAYSTATION version..ahem...'nuff said), and Frontline Road to Moscow is a nice diversion. I mean that in the same way McDonalds is a nice diversion when you're hungry. It's not going to sustain you, but what the hell, huh? To be more specific it's a bit easy for a 'hard core' strategy PC gamer like myself.

Battleheart Legacy really blew me away. I was really impressed with the game-play, graphics, and controls. It felt, at first, like Torchlight II light.....very light. I am currently 5 hours in and am now realizing that it's dead easy and pretty repetitive. Again, damn fine effort for the IOS, and for $5 (and no in-app purchases ever) it represents some pretty good value. However- it's just too easy. There is no penalty for dying at all really (a few coins), and everything just falls dead before you once you get the hang of it. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind that- I modded Torchligh II so I could do easy mode after a few play-throughs- but I really feel the difference between a PC mega-hit like Torchilgh II, and a Ipad mega-hit like Battleheart Legacy. It's like candy: cheap and cheerful and built for gamers on the move or with limited myself I suppose.

We'll see how it goes once I get a few more IOS titles under my belt. I have played 100's of SolForge games on my phone, so all is not lost. I also just downloaded Republique (currently free) and am so stoked about this game I've decided to wait and give it a proper review. Someone in the app store comments section suggested that this is a must for anyone considering the Ipad as a serious gaming platform and so far (less than one hour in) I am in agreement with that.

Monday, March 17, 2014

It's Paddy's Day You Feckers.

That's right- like every other North American, Irish-wannabe wanker I'm drinking Guinness and whiskey. Being that I lived in Ireland for some time I at least do it in class- it's not green and the whiskey's Canadian because lets' face it, Irish whiskey generally sucks. So if you're swilling green beer in some shit 'pub' and pounding the Jamesons here's a clue- we made fun of you in Ireland on Paddy's day so take that stupid green frilly hat off and relax with a proper drink. There, I feel better now. One-and-a half Guinness and I turn in to a right gobshite don't I?

Last time at this year I was getting ready to head to a wedding in Ireland, and this year we are on the move once again. For all my cyber-stalker out there who are obviously gutted I haven't posted in months, I'll fill you in as quickly as possible. I took a new position with the Slave Drivers in a new town four-ish hours away. As an added bonus we're also buying our first house (not provided by the Slave Drivers) because the new Outpost has a lower cost of living. We are still getting by on one income so buying here in a real city was out of the question unless we fancied living in a gang-tagged crack den. And that's crack, not craic for the Irish-savvy.

In two weeks then, we are once again packing up and heading out though to be fair in order to entice me to the middle of nowhere the Slave Drivers have purchased a transport caravan so someone else will have the pleasure of packing and moving my worldly goods whilst I sit in a hotel room waiting for it all to be over. Except for canned goods. They won't take any liquids because they will freeze in our artic clime and they can't be responsible for ruining all our food. Instead we have to throw it away or donate it to a food bank or something. My vote is to try to eat it all. Yum, let's all have another helping of jam and beans with a side of random hot sauce.

So food, dogs, fish, kids, and any liquid not there-in included gets left behind. Well, not really. The dogs are being kenneled and delivered, the fish have been re-homed and the kid is coming with. I've grown quite attached to New Mouth To Feed so I've decided to keep her and possibly create another. Yikes.

My life is very different, to say the least. New responsibility both in and out of work means that how I use my free time is changing dramatically. My gaming is shifting to mobile platforms. I am still playing a lot of games, but now it's almost exclusively Sol Forge due to it's accessibility on PC, Ipad, and Iphone. I can get my fix anytime, anywhere...yes, even on the toilet so que up suckers! I estimate I've played over 2,000 games thus far and it's still a lot of fun and all for free! I've only put $20 into the game during their 50% off sale. I've not turned cheap, I just think their pricing model is the most ludicrously expensive I have ever seen and unless they add lube and condoms to their virtual trading card packs, I'm not spending much more.

Right so, let's keep this short. We have pints to drink, green or otherwise, and New Mouth To Feed has finally fell asleep so I'm off to spend some time with She Who Will Be Named Later. I leave you with this, a great Irish-sung song written by an American about Ireland, that me and my daughter dance to quite regularly. Her mom and I were married in Galway and we gave her an Irish name so I felt it was fitting that she knows what proper Irish craic is all about.

This song was recorded in an Irish Pub, a real pub, without the expectation it would become a mega-hit on You Tube. This is how the pub sessions were- fun and laid back. I often miss that so much sometimes, oh and do please note the lack of green beer and fecking ridiculous leprecaun outfits.

A grand soft day indeed. Enjoy!

Friday, January 3, 2014

Solforge: Triple Threat

It's been a long time since I had that feeling- you know the one. The feeling that you are hooked on a new game. The type of hooked where you think about it constantly- hmmm, maybe I should try this- you think to yourself while bathing.....eating...driving....attempting to sleep.... It's awful. In a good kind of way.

I've waited for some time before officially deciding I was hooked. I hate to jump to conclusions, you see, but it is official. I am, in fact, hooked on this game. It's just bloody awesome.

 I started to get interested in Digital Trading Card games when I saw +Force Strategy Gaming and his Friday Night Magic videos on YouTube.. I bought Duels of the Planeswalkers and really, really liked it, but it didn't hook me. Long wait times for Multi player matches left me quite bored and avoiding boredom is the whole reason I play games in the first place. I got into the +Hearthstone Beta but the flashy animations and the ridiculous voice screaming in the tutorial meant I didn't get very far. Five minutes is about all I could handle proving once again, at least to me, if it's really popular, it usually sucks.

Solforge is currently in beta, and it's free- yea, I know that seems odd in the days of pay-your-way-in to alpha games. I wonder what's next- give some developer ten bucks and he'll tell you what he's thinking of making....someday...maybe. In any case it is free, and it will be Free To Play. I have currently spent a grand total of ZERO dollars on it and I'm having a good time. I believe there is a matchmaking system at play so I usually win as many as I lose. It's also on Steam so it's easy to get. Unfortunately for me it's also on Ipad and Iphone which means there isn't a single scenario in my life where I can't try and get a cheeky game in, and boy do I ever. That's what I mean by 'triple threat'. It's everywhere I go, all the time. It's also seamless so if I'm playing on my phone, and I walk over to the computer and load it up, it loads into the exact game on the exact turn I was playing. That's damn nice.

There have been times in my blogging life where I knew I was at the start of something. Just over three years ago I began to notice that most of my posts here focused on World of Tanks- a move away from Warhammer Online which had been my previous three-year thing. Now, ironically enough, Warhammer is shutting down- not ironic in terms of the reasons- it sucks and no one is playing- but ironic in the sense that I've found a new game that's dominating my time as it does so.

My new years schedule is full of 'away' so I will be mobile and likely playing nothing but Solforge for the better part of the next two months. My You Tube endeavors will eventually add Solforge to the mix as well. With War Thunder now adding tanks I wonder how much longer good ole World of Tanks will continue to keep me enthralled even if just a little.