Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Making It Harder Than It Has To Be. WoT Update

I have this tendency, both in-game and out, to make things harder than they have to be. Sometimes it's about the challenge, other times it's procrastination, and sometimes it's about denying myself the satisfaction of enjoying something. Sounds stupid, I know, but old habits are sometimes hard to break and the 'punishing myself' thing goes back a long way and originates in some real-life bollocks that bores me (and my numerous shrinks throughout the years) to think about.

I had one goal in World of Tanks. I wanted the T-44 Tier VIII Russian medium. I liked the look of it, played it on various test servers, and found that I really liked it. It seemed to fit my play-style perfectly. Other than the KV-13 I didn't much like the earlier tanks in the Russian medium tree so I decided I would skip them with free experience. I saved up 250,000 free experience with my KV-13 but decided that I would 'grind it out' so I bought the T-43. I didn't like this tank, but I did really well with it in terms of win-ratio and kills-per-game. Further proof the T-44 would be great I thought.

But still I waited. I procrastinated and piddled about with other things. I suffered through a lot tank destroyers I didn't like to get the Object 704. I bought the Type 59. I got the IS-4, then unlocked the IS-7. I maxed out the Tiger P and bought (and sold) the E-50. I went up the US medium line to the Pershing and then I went back to the M6 to unlock the T-29. I decided to try scouting so I added the Chaffee to my collection (with the T-50 and T-50-2). I had, along the way, unlocked the T-44, readied a crew and bought all the modules for it (wet ammo rack essential) but still I waited.

Now I feel that my time with World of Tanks is coming to an end. I used to play a couple hundred matches a week and now I'm only getting in around 10-20. I've now surpassed 1,000 hours of game time according to Raptr, and I played my 7,500th battle a couple weeks ago. I find I can only take a handful of games in a night before I get frustrated. I hate to lose, you see, the and the game is balanced so you lose 50% of the time in public matches no matter how well you play.

Not bad for a career in PUGs.

With the dusk of my virtual tank career at hand I decided last night to quit pissing about and get the T-44. Here, at the end, I would allows myself the satisfaction of getting the one bloody tank I always wanted. I used 50k free experience to upgrade my tracks, turret, and engine and away I went. In my first three games I racked up 10 kills. The T-44 feels like it's been in my garage since the start. It fits my play-style perfectly and it goes without saying I should have bought this baby 5,000 battles ago when the game was fresh!

I'm selling every tank that I don't do well in, or that I don't like. I'm abandoning the idea of  grinding anything. From now until the end it's tanks I like only- something that should have been my focus from the start but in fairness, despite my own self-sabotaging ways, the game is set up as a bit of a grindy-treadmill and for me, it's time to get off.

The horse on which I will ride into that sunset.

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