Friday, May 18, 2012

Fortuitious Fridays: Tom Petty Was Right

I like Tom Petty, and I have to say, he was right: the waiting is the hardest part. Remember the Simpson's episode where Homer applies to get a gun and has to wait out his..well, waiting period? Yea, that's a bit how I feel at the moment. Not so much in the 'I can't wait to get my gun and show everyone who's in charge' kinda way, but more in the listless, impatient way. New Mouth To Feed, you see (previously due last Sunday), has decided to be fashionably late.

Typical, I would say, of the female gender, but the collective intake of breath from all the feminists who surely read my blog would be too much to bear and might cause a global weather disturbance of the highest magnitude. To be fair now, She Who Will Be Named Later is never late...except when it comes to giving birth it would seem, but that's hardly her fault.....or is it......

What is a 'due date' anyway? From what I've gathered no one really knows what triggers that baby to begin it's journey into the world. What the hell are they thinking anyway? Here they are, nine-months in a comfortable place, well fed, and at peace with the world and then suddenly they decide 'I've got to get the hell out of here'. The exit has been there, all along, so why now? It's all a huge mystery to me, in any case, as I've stuck to my decision to read absolutely nothing about child-birth or parenthood. Ignorance is bliss, isn't it? What's that? Can't hear la la la la la la la la la.

Yes, well, in the meantime I'm not exactly 'on form' at work or play as I can't focus.....or drink too much in case I have to drive a certain someone to the hospital. I've been told in no certain terms that calling for a cab due to having consumed too much alcohol is 'out of the fucking question you idiot' so I'm forced to suffer through a mostly-sober waiting period. My only consolation is the gift of a flask (my first ever) for the purpose of bringing a little something with me to wet the baby's head. For those of you who think I'll actually be pouring fine scotch on the baby's head, well..... there might be no hope for you ;)

I can't embed at the moment so in case the above video doesn't appear click this and hope for the best.

Happy Friday Everyone!

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