Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Feck You Geese!

A late post from the archives that I fogot to post before the snow fell...better late than never (yes, I'm lazy today).

It's official. Winter's iminent, icy embrace is always heralded by the flocking of the Canadian Geese to better climes. I can't help but envy the ones who flock south to the U.S. and marvel in the stupidity of the ones who head east to the U.K. Sure, it's a warmer but if you had the option of Florida or Foggy 'ole England....


Well, feck them all, wherever they flee to. In what I think has been a long time in coming I'm going to petition the government, or Duck's Unlimited, or whoever is in charge of such matters (pornographers, or maybe ornithographers......) to strip the "Canadian" out of the Canada Goose. Real Canadians suck it up, throw on a parka, and stick around for the winter. Flee south! How very dare they.

Alternatively one could argue the humble Goose has a lot more brains than the average Canadian. Every winter (and you will see this in print come January or so) I ask myself :
"Why the fuck do you live here you moron?"
I can't help but marvel at the early pioneers. When you stand in the middle of the prarie with nothing visible for as far as the horizon stretches and think of the conditions they must have suffered through to make this land habitable... It boggles the mind. It must have been a strange combination of bravery and stupidity that held them fast those first few winters. I also wonder how many just decided "the hell with this" and went back to where the came from. Likely not many as those who did come wouldn't have had the means to go back home. Poor bastards.


  1. Actually, its Canada Geese, not Canadian Geese.



  2. See, not considering themselves 'Canadian'....Just another reason to disown them imo :)